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Friday, July 16, 2004
Why Homosexuals Are Terrorist Magnets
Yesterday we learned from Joseph Farah that people who voted against the Federal Marriage Amendment are probably going to hell. Unfortunately, the news doesn't get any better for our pink-loving friends today.
A quick trip over to Bush Country reveals that the terrorists hate us because of our gays! The ever informative Tamara Wilhite has written a new column explaining why terrorists want to kill us. At least I think that's what it's about. It gets a little confusing. And fast. Anyway, here's Tammy.
I’ve heard the liberals complaining that Republicans brought the Marriage Amendment up for a vote to divide the electorate. Excuse me? I thought we were already polarized with the Red State-Blue State maps. Perhaps forcing the Democratic Duo to actually take a side with an absolute yeah or nay vote going to give clarification to that fraction of undecided “liberal but not willing to admit it” voters that Kerry is a thin margin away from Government Mandated Free Love. Hence the vote would lead a percentage point or two of undecided folk into finally deciding once and for all on Bush.
I've read that paragraph about 8 times and I still can't make any sense of it. Better just move on.
What does this have to do with terrorism? Quite a bit. These Muhajadeen – mad Muslim Men – hate us. Their real reason is that we refuse to roll over and cry Mullah. Their stated reasons are our evil vice and our support for Israel.
Somehow I'm guessing it's slightly more complex than that. But it's Tammy's column so let's let her continue.
How does the failure of the Federal Marriage Amendment play into their hands? Not only do we allow our women to go unveiled. Not only do we allow our daughters to have sex outside of marriage. Not only do we allow abortion. Not only do we allow women equal rights. We dare to allow homosexuality to exist.
Right. If we just stopped allowing our daughters to have sex outside of marriage then we wouldn't suffer any more of these terrible attacks! Hooray or Tammy!
And hey, come to think of it, if we would just stop doing evil things like giving equal rights to women and allowing homosexuality to exist then the mean terrorists would probably go away altogether!
In Muslim countries, the punishment for homosexuality ranges from death to a long prison sentence. Mohammed’s word was for homosexuals to be executed. Not only do we allow homosexuals to exist. Not only don’t we allow them to live, we tolerate them living in the open.
First we allow the evil gays to exist. Then we don't allow them to live. Never let it be said that Tammy can't see both sides of an issue.
They can be seen in public office and public broadcasting. Now, worst of all, we are granting them equal parity in the law with heterosexual couples. If that is not giving the green light to sin, then neither is Madonna dancing around in the near nude provocative.
I always kind of figured the terrorists didn't much care for the Christian God. Now it turns out they'd leave us all alone if we just stopped sinning. Is Tammy saying the terrorists are godly Christian people? It sure sounds like it.
We don’t stop lesbians from making children. Our courts are slowing giving homosexuals equal adoption rights to children.
Yes! Curse our nation for not stopping lesbians from making children! Curse our courts for slowing giving homosexuals equal adoption rights to children!
Now we are unwilling to say that two men or two women married in a civil ceremony are not equal to the natural pairing of man to woman. We have just given the signal that we are the Sodom and Gomorrah cesspool they accuse us of being. All with Kerry and the other Democrats’ support.
So basically the terrorists hate us because we sin. And why do we sin? Because John Kerry and the Demoncrats make us!
If buses of Israeli schoolchildren die for Israel’s existence and Spanish commuters die for their government having a few hundred peacekeepers in Iraq, I wonder how big the gay target will be bombed in protest for this evil.
I'm going to say this as nicely as I can...
Tammy, honey...I know you were flattered when Rush called you up saying he was lonely. But baby, please, next time stay out of his medicine cabinet until after you've written your column.